This is topic Wills/transfer of estates. ect. in forum Member forum at The New Huntmastersbbs!.
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Posted by TA17Rem (Member # 794) on May 29, 2026, 06:09 PM:
My father in-law passed away this week so I have some questions about wills that are drawn up by a Lawyer. Does a Lawyer call everyone in thats on the will or do they just give it to appointed administrator and he handles it??? If lawyer does, how long do that take?? Just curious and don't trust two brother in-laws.
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on May 30, 2026, 12:57 AM:
It's my understanding that the named 'Executor Of The Estate' handles everything. The Reading Of The Will is just Hollywood B.S.
It may or may not be different from state to state.
Cheap Advice; If you have any doubts, contact an impartial attorney & pay the Consulting Fee. Then you can move forward with actual facts rather than just something you read on the internet.
Condolences and good luck. I've seen families torn apart and get ugly over what amounted to 'just stuff'.
Posted by TA17Rem (Member # 794) on May 30, 2026, 06:13 AM:
I don't care who gets what but just wanted to know who watches over the 'Executor Of The Estate' to see that all wishes are carried out?? I suppose I would have to ask for a copy of will or find the lawyer that wrote it up. Funny part was father in-laws sons never had time to come visit with him but did find enough time to pillage through the house before he was even put in the ground. my father in-law did mention certain things in last two years about his estate and if what he said is true I just want to make sure things are carried out like supposed to be.
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on May 30, 2026, 11:12 AM:
Yes, events that transpire due to a will are long lasting. Very close relatives will fuck over very close relatives and think nothing of it..
My grandparents died in Phoenix, close to my Dad’s brother and his two girls. By the time my parents got to Phoenix, nothing left of monetary value or sentimental value, some kitchen utensils. Left a bit of hard feelings between my dad and his two brothers. Every time I visit my two cousins I see family heirlooms prominately displayed, and you could think, gee sounds a little petty over mementoes but when one side has a houseful of your childhood memories and you have literally; nothing, well it can’t help but cause hard feelings that can’t be explained and yet the folks with the antiques seem oblivious. And, I’m not exaggerating.
A very similar situation when my mother died in Tumwater, Washington. Guess who else lives in Tumwater? My brother. When I found out that my father’s hand made, scale model, brass (and fully functioning) French Napoleonic period (true scale model about 16” barrel with a 5/8” bore, Canon was given to my brother’s son, I felt just a tiny bit put out! No questions, no discussion, just quietly passed to his only son, and who never even knew my father! Stuff like that, and my brother was one of the executors and he quietly took his extra 10% as executor of the modest estate, for doing nothing.
All this to say that these little trinkets have meaning to some people, and some people are willing to cause life long resentment between close relatives, yet they do what they CAN DO, without concern. It can cause long time resentment between families, even if the money is divided evenly to the last dime.
I have a trust, cost me $1,500 and it’s an inch and a half thick a hundred pages or so. Not my idea, my daughter thought everything should be spelled out and handled by a lawyer. I can stipulate who get’s what, like my wife’s diamond and the contents of my safe, for instance. I hand sand cast a brass and aluminum Chess set, which is pretty fancy, if I do say so myself. I will probably have to decide who get’s it? I have a few guns that should go to specific people, IDK? maybe I should write a name on all of them. My father’s ruby ring should probably go to my son, although I know of two females in the family that wear their father’s ring all the time.
Lot’s of hurt feelings when there is a death in the family. Either deliberate or innocently, some people do not care, some people do not care if other’s might care. Easy to hurt feelings over mementoes, regardless of the money and stocks, CD’s and your silver quarter collection. Oh and I forgot, my Zuni Fetish collection has monetary value besides the sentimental value. Everybody should take a few minutes and think about your next of kin and who get’s what when you pass on to your reward.
LB 🐝
Posted by earthwalker (Member # 4177) on May 30, 2026, 02:30 PM:
If you don't like your kids or the rest of the family don't do a will.
If you like your kids love them do a strong will and name who gets what.
Went through this with no will I grabbed what I could and was basically left with little to nothing.. Granddaughter got too much conned my mom. Very hard feelings against the niece.
Posted by TA17Rem (Member # 794) on May 30, 2026, 06:06 PM:
Had funeral today both brother in-laws couldn't even look me in the eye.
I did gather bits and pieces about the will, and it will be done with Lawyer present. A cousin and farmer that rents farmland did mention that father in-laws only grand sone will be taken care of from what he knew. That's the important thing.
My son and me both have spent more time with father in-law than his own dam kids and he also only see's grand kids from other family maybe once or twice a year, they never come to the farm. I did what I could by dropping off a box of KFC once a week, help with upkeep on the farm and taking the time to just sit and talk. that's what a family is supposed to do and how I was brought up.
As for will I don't much care about it just want to make sure my son gets whatever scraps he is entitled too.
Another big question was brought up by my sister; she works at a retirement home and knows some of the laws as far as taking care of your parents when they can't do it themselves.
Couple of weeks ago father in-law fell, not sure if he hurt anything but son in-law showed up at farm and did not take father in-law to doctor.
Then father in-law fell again about week before he was going to be moved to the retirement home, once again no doctor visits. Father in-law is admitted last Monday and passes away on Tuesday.
My sister seems to think there was some laws broken here as far as the care for a family member who couldn't really care for himself.
Not sure if father in-law was giving up as he didn't look well at times and told son to just leave him be at home instead of a doctor or if son just ignored his father and his medical problems. not sure on this but a neighbor who was there may know more so I plan to talk with him. For old guy he was in pretty good shape till last couple of weeks his health began to fail but maybe a doctor could of done something and given him more time on earth. well enough with chit chat.
Posted by TA17Rem (Member # 794) on May 30, 2026, 06:15 PM:
Earthwalker I know what you mean.
My father passed away years ago with no will and mother still living. I made sure all brothers and sisters got as much as they wanted of his so it could be in there home for remembrance and something to pass on. we divided everything pretty much equally. Then years later my younger brother passed with no will also, this time my mom and the girl's kind of grabbed everything in house and did not leave much of anything for my brother's son and 2 daughters that lived far away. I managed to get few items for them, but they should of gotten more but out of my control other than just telling others what they should of done.
My oldest brother then passed away with no will but knew he was sick so he gave a verbal will and gave everything to my sisters sons. I did have to step in on that as my brother had a few family guns that been around long time for generations and I made sure my other brother and two other nephews got one to keep and pass on.
Posted by earthwalker (Member # 4177) on May 31, 2026, 03:40 AM:
Just before my dad passed away I got the rifle he had made for my mom. 6.5 x55 swede Mauser. It was the stock that was important.
I was able to get his fly rod after he passed.
Death in a family isn't fun and the true person really comes out.
Posted by NVWalt (Member # 375) on May 31, 2026, 03:44 AM:
You know this is a common tale but true.It is really sad that "Family" should get that way but it is what it is. Nobody said all was fair.Especially those that feel slighted.
When I go I may make a will but my daughter will have to sort it out with her sister if her sister even wants anything I have. As for the present wife's kids.....I don't know. it's all so nasty sometimes.
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on May 31, 2026, 06:10 AM:
A co-worker told me that when his widowed grandma passed everything went pretty smooth. Vehicles, house, land, crop in the field, all handled in a fair & business like way. Until ......... it came to Grandma's recipe book / binder. All of the women felt that they alone deserved it and the men who liked getting laid now & then backed their women up. Forty years ago and there's still hard feeling over it. Must of been a Hell of a cookbook.
My wife & I had our Wills drawn up by an Attorney and I think that it was money well spent. The guy was thorough to the point of being anal. Executor is named, if that person precedes or is unable, next Executor in line down to about four levels is named.
One less thing for me to worry about.
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
Posted by TA17Rem (Member # 794) on May 31, 2026, 06:17 AM:
Many times no one wants anything until someone finds something they like then all of a sudden everyone wants it.
My son spent a lot of time with Grandfather in his pickup truck just a old chev. pickup and worth about 1K. Son asked brother in-law if he could drive it too funeral and S.B. made a big deal about that.
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on May 31, 2026, 08:46 AM:
Im other words, it looks like it is pretty common for some raiders to clean out what ever is valuable or of keepsake value, while others are left with the bones;and lifetime hard feelings. What my mom did was go through the house and write somebody’s name on a sticker and leave it on the bottom.
My grandfather never drove a car or owned one. way back in the 1920’s one of his friends felt compassion and gave him a cast iron replica of a model T Ford. It was on the rug, in some corner of the living room for as long as I remember, going back to the years after the WWII and we moved back to Minnesota. I used to play with that car, it was built like a tank, I couldn’t hurt it but it could easily put a dent in the wall if I pushed it hard enough, and I did.
Well when my grandfather died, in the late 60’s, in Phoenix, they had some nice antique stuff and they had this model T car. Without much thought, it was decided to give it to my younger brother. He didn’t know my grandparents, lived in southern California his whole life, maybe visited Phoenix a couple times, but he was a kid, and this was a toy car so without much thought, little Tommy got the car that was virtually the only toy I played with in Minnesota, before everybody moved out west. I have to admit, that fucking car and the way it was dismissed and casually awarded to my little spoiled brat brother kind of irked me. Still does! Tom never played with that car, but he was a kid and I was 22, and I got nothing.
That’s how sensitive these little trinkets and mementos are to people. Then remember that this same brother gave my father’s 8 pound French cannon to his son. Why? Because he was the exectutor on site, in Washington when my mother died, and his son asked for it. Well sure, don’t give it another thought! And this is a beautiful hand crafted fully functioning piece. My dad blew off a piece of the wood handrail on his yacht one Fourth of July in Santa Monica Bay when he fired that canon and misjudged the elevation. Tore out a 4 or 5 inch piece of mahogany railing. We had a lot of fun with that canon. My dad bought a tong mold from an outfit that specialized in old stuff and we cast lead balls from wheel weights, if you remember them? He made the carriage by accurate drawings. That’s how he spent his retirement years, woodworking and we dabbled in brass casting, usually for the chess sets we were making by sand casting. But that barrel was turned on a lathe. Anyway, now my nephew has that canon in a closet, I suppose?
Where were we? Oh yeah hard feeling and wills.
LB 🐝
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on May 31, 2026, 09:19 AM:
![[Confused]](confused.gif)
How big was that eight pounder ???
Something like a 4" bore and a 6' barrel was normal, with a weight of about a 1000 pounds for an eight pound light artillery piece.
How cool would it be to take a coyote with a cannon ????? ![[Cool]](cool.gif)
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on May 31, 2026, 10:51 AM:
this was a handful, I suppose it may have weighed 15 pounds, the canon barrel itself was about 16 inches, And I should have mentioned that the blast that took out that section of railing was a blank, no ball but stuffed with toilet paper rammed down the bore behind a scoop of black powder, and intended to just make noise. A wad of toilet paper took out 5 inches of 1X3” wood railing surrounding the back deck. That and “on fire” toilet paper carried by the wind. It was slightly embarassing, at the time.
LB 🐝
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on May 31, 2026, 11:40 AM:
That sounds like a ship signal / salute deck gun.
There is an Urbane Legend about a hunter using one in Colorado during a Muzzel Loader Season with a one or two inch lead ball, set up at a waterhole for elk. Supposedly dropped a Bull, drove a flatbed right up to it, wenched it on and was the first person to ever bring an intact bull elk to a Check Station.
No idea if it's true or not but it makes for a pretty good story around the campfire.
Posted by TA17Rem (Member # 794) on May 31, 2026, 02:07 PM:
Yeah Leonard my Grandma did same thing putting names on objects. you got a little Swede in you after all.
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on May 31, 2026, 06:05 PM:
Where we lived in south Minneapolis was a rather upscale part of town right next to the Hiawatha golf course, upstream of the Minnehaha Falls.and about a half mile from the Mississippi river.
But, to say that it was a primarily Swedish neiborhood
was an understatement. Anderson was probably the most common family name, with maybe Carlson the second popular. But It was not just Swedes, we had a bunch of Norwegians and Finns too. The Poles were mostly on the north side and I personally didn’t know any of them. None. My mother’s mother was Pennsylvania Dutch and as far as I know, it meant German origin. Her father was a Scot. I don’t know why, but my grandmother and her daughters were first class Italian cooks. For some reason, I never thought to ask what the hell that was about? As a kid, I ate more than my share of spaghetti and pasta. They were all heavy into canning, especially tomato’s, but pears and Peaches were plentiful as well. I’ve always made my own spaghetti sauce, stay traditional right down to tying the fennel in a little piece of cotton because momma didn’t like biting down on those seeds but she loved the flavor. My other grandmother that married the pole was French, her maiden name was Normandin, I guess from the area of Normandy along the coast? But she didn’t cook, Stanley, the Pole did all the cooking. He made the most delicious gravies!
Down Memory Lane
LB 🐝
Posted by Dan (Member # 4563) on June 01, 2026, 04:56 PM:
Speaking of Carlson, where is he?
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on June 02, 2026, 11:45 AM:
Vic lurks, has not much to say, moved back to MCNEAL after a few year living in the Florida panhandle. I never asked, and never got a reason for any of it, but it’s not hard to understand a life long Arizonan missing the old neigorhood. Who can blame him? Personally, I think Arizona is by far the most appearing state in which to reside. One thing that has bothered me, when thinking about relocating to Arizona. I’ve been all over, top to bottom, and east to west and I can’t decide what part I like best! As someone here once said, wherever I go, it must be within 20 minutes of a Walmart. Not a bad point when you think about it.
Myself, I think my opportunity has passed me by. I think I’m stuck here in the People’s Republik of Kalifornia. Pray for me.
LB 🐝
Posted by Az-Hunter (Member # 17) on June 04, 2026, 07:54 AM:
Im around, the last six months have been hectic. Health issues have hit both the wife and I, hers more serious than mine, but we are both at that magical age where shit happens.
Its been constant trips to Tucson for either Dr visits, tests, surgeries etc, but it looks like we are about patched up and healed.
My family was lucky, my brother and sister are just great people, when my mother and father passed within 4 months apart, there was never a single dispute over stuff. Sis had power of attorney and had all ducks in a row, easy and no problems.
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on June 05, 2026, 09:16 AM:
That is commendable, Victor! At least there are still a few decent and honorable folks around, just to make everyone else look bad.
As for me and my health; I guess I can’t complain very much. I’ve outlived Nancy, the love of my life by 21 years, so far, and I sure never saw that coming! In fact, my Dad, died at 72 and my mother at 75, and believe it or not, they were both victims of medical malpractice. My grandparents all lived into their mid-nineties.
Lot’s of people tell me that I don’t look or act my age, and I think that observation is meant complementary. Whatever.It is what it is.
LB 🐝
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on June 05, 2026, 10:12 AM:
Personally, I don't know how to act my age 'cause I've never been this old before.
The only Training Manuals I've ever had were treasured Playboys' in my adolescence.
Is there a Geezer's Weekly ????
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on June 05, 2026, 02:44 PM:
Well, if there is, you should make the cover, naked on a Bearskin rug, but just bearing your butt, provocatively. I’m sure the middle aged ladies would swoon! The Peanut Gallery would mock you mercilessly.
LB 🐝
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on June 05, 2026, 05:52 PM:
Funny thing; I belong to a couple of archery clubs.
At Desert Archers in Tucson, I'm often the oldest member in the Traditional Class.
At Apache Bowhunters in Globe, I'm often the youngest guy in the group. We got geezers in their 80s still flinging arrows.
Main thing to remember; A body in motion tends to stay in motion. A body at rest tends to get Last Rites. Get out and DO something !!!!
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on June 06, 2026, 10:44 AM:
Sage advice from our resident dispenser of sage advice. For free! Not counting your membership fees which are cheap at half price.
Are we aging gracefully? Are you starting to notice aches and pains? Like, I don’t know where it started in my left shoulder area? It doesn’t feel like bone, more like ligaments, I think? And I am criminally right handed, my left anything is useless, so Idon’t have a reason for why I have a moderate pain every time I raise my left arm above my head, or even threatening to move it above chest height. This is a rather recent situation, a few months. I’m taking Ibuphorin? the stuff that they say is bad on kidney’s?
Also, standing up from when bent over-squatting outside working in the yard. I have found a cane to be very useful in getting myself back to an upright condition. My legs seem to be weak when it comes to getting back to upright. I have about 6 hand made canes, most are Ironwood. one is Palo Verde, but I refuse to use non desert wood canes. Mesquite would be acceptable, just don’t have any at the moment. I had several Sahuaro but gave them away, have only one left. Maybe I need a replenishment scouting trip?
LB 🐝
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on June 06, 2026, 04:00 PM:
FWIW; I've been known to carry a walking stick on occasion. Balances better than a cane and has more reach when you need to do something reach-y.
Other than a ski-pole when wading the river, the best staff I've found are the dried flower stalks of Joshua Trees. Lightweight, strong, good balance, & free. The extra length is nice on a side-hill, too.
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on June 06, 2026, 05:19 PM:
Yes, I can see the advantage. I have a couple of them, different variety but same idea, very light weight, pretty much need a glove.
Not much charm, no drama, utilitarian, I grant you. I’m just ragging on desert hardwoods for the classy status. When somebody says oh yeah, this here walking stick is walnut or Beech and then he says; what you got there? If I say Mesquite, that pretty well shuts him down, at least in my mind. Not to be mean, but you will be a point up. If we are keeping score.
LB 🐝.
Posted by Az-Hunter (Member # 17) on June 06, 2026, 07:59 PM:
Im not at the cane stage.....yet. My recent pain in the ass has been my left wrist/hand. Jan 30th I had a proximal row carpectomy on left wrist. Fancy description of basically removing the large bone in the wrist called the scaphoid, then screwing together 4 other bones in the wrist. Doesn't articulate as well as a wrist should, basically turns it into a hinge joint, but relieves a ton of wrist pain. Had the right hand done 12 years ago, and it is great, this one, Im not so sure the outcome will be as good?
Not sure if I will be able to shoot a handgun any longer with left had, but Im working it like a mad man trying to squeeze all the mobility I can out of it.
Two weeks ago, had a carpal tunnel release surgery done on the same left hand, so it's been a double wammy....will see how it all shakes out.
Carry on you old codgers, Im right behind you!
Posted by TA17Rem (Member # 794) on June 07, 2026, 08:39 AM:
Get well soon Vic. hey you can always shoot 22 l.r. or air gun matches.
Posted by Kokopelli (Member # 633) on June 07, 2026, 09:00 AM:
Never underestimate today's 'air guns'. Serious precision & power. Competitions can get pretty intense.
They ain't the BB Guns we shot as kids.
Posted by Leonard (Member # 2) on June 07, 2026, 05:12 PM:
Now you know that boney bump that we all have on the wrist,Right? if that is what Victor is talking about, IDK? But a couple years ago, maybe 3 or 4, I had a sharp Chef’s knife in my hand. PS- ALL MY KNIVES ARE SHARP!
Okay, so I had this sharp knife in my right hand and ,,,,
(not even drinking, I don’t really drink, one beer or Margarita every other month, maybe?)
But anyway, I had a fly land on that bump a few times and I was aggravated, not thinking too focused and I swatted at the persistent fly with what I intended to be the back or maybe the flat of that long sharp knife; and it was more like. chopping kindling or something? I really whacked it solid from the direction of my left shoulder and down with a thunk into that bone that sticks out! Holy shit, I stuck it, had to wiggle it a bit to unstick it! A boneheaded absentminded little trick you don’t pull very often.
It healed fine except it sticks out a lot further than it used to. The swelling never went down, but it doesn’t hurt now/ One of the dumbest stunts I’ve pulled in a long time, for sure!
El Bee
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